Feeling Your Fear is the Only Way Through It
If you grew up in the church, you may have learned that fear is bad.
The Bible encourages us to be courageous and fear not, yet simply treating fear as bad and avoiding it at all costs is an oversimplification of how we are designed to interact with our emotions. The biggest problem that I can see arising from this flawed approach is the mindset that "If fear is bad, when I feel fear I must be bad." That can lead us to trying to figure out all kinds of ways to shut it down or run away from it.
The truth is that although God doesn't intend for us to live in a constant state of fear, he created us with all of our emotions. Our emotions are important in giving us information, and when we try to shut them down, or judge them as bad, we can miss the message they are trying to send.
When we try to ignore fear, it doesn't go away. In fact, the opposite usually happens - it grows.
When fear shows up, there is a reason.
First, let's remove the judgement. Experiencing fear does not mean that you are bad or that you did something wrong.
Next, let yourself acknowledge that the fear is there and begin to get curious. You can simply ask, “Fear, what are you trying to show me?” When you begin to get curious, you might be surprised at what you discover.
Lastly, after taking time to get curious and address the source of the fear, be intentional about connecting yourself back to safety.
Simple Ways to connect to safety:
Take some deep breaths.
Make a list of all the people that love you.
Look around the room and bring your attention to something in the space that makes you feel safe. It could be a warm blanket, the door symbolizing that you are able to leave if you need to, or a favorite book that brings comfort.
**A quick disclaimer about connecting to safety: I do want to encourage you to make sure that you are not trying to connect to safety in an effort to superficially bypass the emotion of fear.
Is fear an emotion that you have a hard time feeling? You're definitely not alone, and I hope these simple steps will be helpful for you whenever you notice fear pop up!
I hope you found this helpful and encouraging!
Sending you so much love on your journey,
Jess
I also wanted to make sure to let you know about this FREE 5 Day Emotionally Healthy Mom’s Challenge I have going on right now. You will get 5 days of tools and resources sent right to your inbox. Don’t miss it!
